Rotations

So we've had our rotations lottery. I got *undisclosed location*, which allows my husband and I to stay in our current apartment. This brings us great happiness, as we really like our apartment. It does mean that I'm going to be completing a 45-50 min commute most days, but I've done that before and it really doesn't seem that bad to me.

Now I'm just excited to get out of the classroom and into the hospitals. Yeah, the hours will suck, but I won't be sitting for 8-12 hours a day.

I can now run a 10 min 54 sec mile.

Winter, pt II

Dear New England,
It's winter. Less rain, more snow. Seriously. I love rain and all, but it's winter.

Also it smells like corn dogs in here. What's the deal with that?

Winter

So between about 10pm last night and 1pm today, we managed to get at least a foot of snow. I didn't measure it because I was too busy cursing as it came up to my knees when I walked out to meet Cathy today. We live in a city that has epic plows of doom. They circulate not infrequently and clear our streets so that they are passable. However, the snow that they move has to go somewhere, generally along the periphery of the street. This means that it gets pushed into driveways. Yup, we had a veritable 2.5 foot tall jersey barrier of snow in our driveway today. I spent about 30 minutes hacking away at a portion of it with a snow shovel from Wal*Mart, dutifully piling up hunks of snow and ice on the snow covered lawn. I had triumphantly (pathetically?) cleared about a quarter of the entire thing when our neighbor with the industrial strength snow blower showed up to clear the entire jersey barrier and our driveway in 25 minutes. I am torn between feeling depressed by the futility of my actions and impressed by the relative ease that the snow blower did its job. Either way, I think I owe that man a good bottle of wine or cookies.

New Year's Ramblings

So I won't lie. The Haiti thing is really getting to me. I mean, it's just so completely ridiculous. Haiti was already one of the most unstable, impoverished nations in the world and now they have to deal with the fact that most, if not all, of their infrastructure is destroyed.

That and I saw Sanjay Gupta treating a 15 day old infant with a skull laceration yesterday. On CNN. I started to cry, at the gym, while running on the treadmill. I then gave all of the money in my wallet to Doctors Without Borders (MSF).

I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up, but it might be a good idea to avoid growing up for the foreseeable future.

I'm learning to read EKGs. It's essentially like trying to comprehend the scribbles of your best friend's child; they mean something to them, but to you, they're gibberish. It's one of those skills, however, that I think every doctor should have, even if all they can do is think, "huh, this is not good. I better call a cardiologist/the ER."

Today is atypical; let me give you an example of typical

Today I am sick. This means that I'm doing school work at home, in my jammies. Some of my classmates do this every day. I like going to school, though, because classes can be helpful. Something about actually seeing the professors is good. Needless to say, though, that today is atypical. I slept until 10 and am already considering a nap. My head is full of cobwebs and my brain is trying to exit through my nose. Gross, I know.

But what is a typical day for me?
4:30am - cat starts batting at my face; he thinks it's food time. I ignore him.
5:00am - alarm goes off. I hit the snooze and lie there for five more minutes. Then, I get up and gather everything together. Books, clothes, food.
5:45am - feed the cats and leave for the gym.
6:00am - arrive at gym. Somehow convince myself that it is a good idea that I do this most mornings. Claim an elliptical/treadmill.
7:10am - realize that it's 7:10am and run to the locker room. Shower.
7:45am - go to car, swap gym bag for school bag and breakfast.
8:00am - arrive in class, eat breakfast, and sit in same seat for four hours.
12:00pm - lunchtime! sometimes I actually get to eat with friends. Other times, there are meetings.
1:00pm - 5:00pm - class.
5:00pm - on most days, I am able to head home and study until husband gets off work at 6pm.
6:00pm - husband gets off work, cats demand food, we make dinner and feed cats. We talk about our days and eat together. Sometimes we watch something funny.
7:30pm - study for a bit, or until bedtime.
9:30-10:00pm - we head to bed and/or play card games for a bit and/or read.
11:00pm - we actually fall asleep.

I've been called a gunner a few times this week. "Gunner" for those not in the know, is a word used in medical schools to describe very driven students, often in a negative light. In my mind, at least, "gunner" connotes a negative sentiment.

I also feel like I'm the least gunner like person I know. Yeah, I'm trying to do my best in medical school, but I would never sabotage my classmates. I also pretty much don't care how I do in my classes anymore, so long as I pass the courses. I've also started casually studying for boards, which is apparently quite weird. I think it makes sense to study as we go through the courses; I've purchased a few books and I'm working through them along with my courses. We'll see what happens with this.

I just don't feel like a gunner. My classmates probably meant this in more of a complimentary way than I'm thinking...at least I hope so...

Nature

Today, one of my professors, who also happens to be a physician (shocker, I know) gave me an assignment. She told me to go take a walk outside for at least 20 minutes.

Best homework ever.

Halloween

A little boy came to our door dressed up as a compact fluorescent light bulb, complete with a band that listed his wattage and amps used. Best costume ever.

October

It's currently my favorite time of year. It's the time of year that (at least in New England) wild turkeys run rampant and wild along the highways, that frost lingers in the air, and that everything is pumpkin flavored. I love fall, and it is 100% more awesome here than it was in Washington State. People here get really into fall. They go on hay rides, make really elaborate corn mazes and open them up to the public, float pumpkin boats down rivers, and attempt to make anything and everything pumpkin flavored. It is a pretty awesome season.

Yesterday, my husband and I went to the most massive corn maze ever with another couple. The theme was "Under the Sea," and supposedly if you looked at the maze from a helicopter, it actually formed the image of a lobster and other sea life. It also encompassed 5 acres of maze goodness. There's something really neat about running around in corn fields. After we finished the maze, we went on a hay ride to look for pumpkins. That was fun too, although we left without pumpkins. You have to find just the right one, y'know? It has to speak to you. This same farm also had a corn cannon, where you could shoot ears of corn across a field to hit wooden cut outs. Although we didn't try it, we got a big kick out of watching little kids attempt to hit a blue cow made out of old oil drums.

Anyway, I'm on day four of a four day weekend, which means (predictably) that I've had a lot of fun and gotten plenty of sleep but I haven't accomplished much in the way of school work. That's today. It's time to learn about psychiatry.

Neuro drawing to a close

Our last neuro exam is on Friday. It will emphasize diseases, radiology, and pharmacology. This is great, because most of us totally forgot about the pharmacology part due to being overwhelmed by the neurology part. As such, due to our fear of failing neuro, we're all going to fail pharm. We clearly planned this well.

I wrote a haiku.
"Primary brain lymphoma / ring enhancing pics / periventricular spread."
Clearly, I've lost my mind. But I remember things about primary brain lymphoma now...

You know you live in a small town when...

Your bank calls you to wish you a happy birthday, and it's not an automated call.
Dogs sleep in the middle of the road and cars drive around them (this happens when I drive to school periodically).

In other news, neuro is grinding to a finish; our last exam is on October 2nd. I think it's safe to say that we're all pretty much ready for it to be over, although there are certainly a few budding neurologists in our crew who have emerged triumphant and glorious over the material. I, however, am not likely one of those people.

Tomorrow I have the second of three tests for our Neuroscience class. This one is purported to be the most difficult; as such, my classmates and I are finding ourselves both panicking about the amount of material and lacking in motivation to study the material. Case in point - I'm writing this right now.

So I posted a note on facebook, asking people what was one memory they had of me. My brother (who I didn't grow up with past the age of about 2) replied, saying that I "wore a tiny little football helmet and didn't make eye contact."

I think it's interesting what his 7 year old self noticed about me before I vanished from his life.

When I grow up...

Here are (in no particular order) the things that I am thinking of being when I grow up.

*General pediatrician - I like kids. They are fun to care for.
*Pediatric palliative care doctor - I like kids, families, comfort care, and counseling. Also, I have an "in" at one of the fellowship sites.
*Palliative care doc - this is the non-pediatric form. I like it for pretty much the same reasons as the pediatric form.
*Physical medicine and rehab - helping people regain function is awesome.
*Child psychiatry - this is actually the thing that set me on this long, circuitous path in the first place; I took general psych when I was 16 years old, loved it, wanted to do more and go to medical school, and very shortly thereafter convinced myself that I wasn't smart enough to do so. Then, five years later, I took a neuroscience course that made me realize that although I might not be smart enough, I am determined enough.
*Neurology - I like brains. They're fun. I like puzzles. They're fun.

Basically, I like the notion of comfort in medicine. This is what I get from this. With the exception of just being a general pediatrician, all of these options would require either a 3 year residency and a fellowship (usually 1-2 years) or a 4 year residency (PM&R, combined peds-psych, combined peds-internal meds) or both.

Yikes.

I haven't written in a while; there are a number of reasons for this. The most compelling is that I am in the midst of learning everything humanly possible about neuroanatomy and neurology in six weeks. Additionally, I'm lazy. Also, there are some strange things occurring around me. Suffice it to say that medical school is keeping on keeping on, and there is minimal drama (ok, so the lack of drama is a lie).

Another year, another $60,000

Second year is started; we're going full swing at this point. If you live in New England, you'll know that summer just now started. This past week, it's been high 80's-mid 90's with 75% humidity. It's great times, studying instead of being out on the beach.

Also, if you live in New England, you know that the mosquitoes are pure, unfettered evil. You go outside and get bit immediately.

Med school is expensive. I'm weighing financing options that include but are not limited to joining the army, national health service corps loan repayment plans, public health service corps, just paying off the quarter million, working in under served areas or public service for ten years while making income based payments and then having the remaining debt forgiven, and getting a wealthy benefactor. As of this point, the two top options are joining the army and doing the ten year public service/loan forgiveness program. I'm honestly torn between the two, because they both honestly have some benefits and negative points. I've been talking to loads of people about both options. There are quite a few military scholars at my school, all of whom have had different experiences. We'll see what's in store, I suppose.