The No S Diet

Husband and I have decided that it is high time that we embark on healthier lives. I already exercise a fair amount, and it sure seemed like we ate healthy. His job, however, keeps him tethered to a desk chair for hours upon hours every week day. Between that and the fact that we both have sweet tooths, we've managed to become somewhat...chubby.

Anyway, husband found a diet on the internet that is actually quite reasonable. The creator of the diet sums it up in fourteen words. "No snacks, no sweets, no seconds, except (sometimes) on days that start with S." It's just that simple. Every meal, you get one plate. You don't have to eat everything on your plate, but you can't fill it up again. That's all you get until the next mealtime. Sweets are defined as, well, sweets. Any food item that is eaten purely because it's sweet. Sugar in coffee is ok; a frappucino is not. Sugar in tea is ok; a milkshake is not. Seltzer water (the zero calorie kind) is ok; pepsi or coke are not. A snack is anything eaten between meals. This does not mean that you can't eat chips or pretzels; they simply need to go on your plate during a mealtime.

So far, this is the most realistic diet I've ever been on, primarily because you can still eat just about anything. Want a hamburger for dinner? Fine, you can have it, but you can't have any snacks or sweets. Want spagetti? Go for it. There's no diet food to buy, no forbidden foods a la Atkins or South Beach, and no punishing yourself if you mess up. If you mess up, so what? Don't do it again. Learn from it.

Granted, husband and I are trying to eat healthy foods, lots of fruits and veggies, simply because they are better for you. And we're attempting exercise. The creator of the diet also has an exercise program that he developed. It's got to be the most bizzare exercise program that I've ever attempted, or seen attempted. It requires no gym membership and minimal equipment. Namely, it requires a sledgehammer. You really have to see it to believe it, I think. Husband is going for it; I've tried it for three days now, and while I'll probably do it again, I am very anxious to get back to my kickboxing videos.

Fortunately/Unfortunately

We feel, sometimes, like we're living in a fortunately/unfortunately book. You know, the ones that say things like, "Fortunately, Suzy got ice cream. Unfortunately, she dropped it." Ours would be different though.

Fortunately, we got the cats through airport security. Unfortunately, one of them used my chest as a spring board to try to get away and now I have a righteous cut.
Fortunately, we didn't miss our flight. Unfortunately, it was a red-eye and neither of us got any sleep.
Fortunately, we arrived in Boston with little incident. Unfortunately, we then had to drive in Boston.
Fortunately, we were able to find our way to the interstate with little incident. Unfortunately, we discovered the toll road.
Fortunately, we had change for the toll road. Unfortunately, we then arrived in New Hampshire and had to pay another toll.
Fortunately, we acclimated to New Hampshire. Unfortunately, New Hampshire lasted about ten minutes.
Fortunately, we had several leads on apartments. Unfortunately, some of these places seemed to be approaching crack den level skeezy.
Fortunately, we found an amazing house with beach front property. Unfortunately, there was no way that we could afford it.
Fortunately, we found an awesome townhouse up for rent. Unfortunately, it wasn't available until July 16th.

And so on. We're doing ok now, as we've got an apartment and have a car. However, it sure took a while to get here. And now, one of the cats is hiding under the floor somewhere. No, we don't know why. No, we can't get her to come out.

The East Coast

So husband and I are experiencing culture shock. The first bit of this involved toll roads. Washington State just got a toll bridge recently. It was a very big deal, lots of angry people, etc. Good times. Well here, just about every time you go on the interstate, you pay a toll. Sometimes twice, if you cross from one state to another. This really confused us while we were driving north on Monday, because we'd already paid a toll to get onto the interstate in Boston. Then we realized that Massachusetts had ended, and we'd entered New Hampshire. Just when we got used to that, we left New Hampshire. It lasted ten minutes. I'd like to see some of these folks go out west where you can drive in Montana for eight hours and still be in Montana two days later. That'd break their little brains. We saw a house that was a little ways out of town (like two miles) and the landlord actually said that it wasn't "that long" of a drive. Like two miles was a real hardship.

Also, everything is older, and the apartments look funny. Almost all of the buildings are converted from something else; most are old manors or boarding houses. Nearly all are at least fifty years old, although one building we looked at was nearly one hundred years old. As such, everything, even the nice places, is cobbled together in a funny fashion. Takes some getting used to. These places would not work on the west coast; no one would want to rent them. I've really had to work on the whole not judging a book by its cover. We found two really nice apartments that are quite lovely on the inside but less than ideal on the outside. I suppose it's a common cliche for people of all sorts, but when I come from a state where apartment buildings are pretty awesome looking, it's difficult.

Homeless

We are currently homeless. It's fine in our case, since we're crashing up north at husband's childhood home. It's been nice to hang out with friends and families that we've been close to for years. The bittersweetness of it all is quite poignant. There are moments of absolute beauty and utter sadness. Quite often, one follows the other. We were at a dinner party with some of our lovely friends (essentially adopted family) and we were laughing and watching the water birds dive and the humming birds flit. This is something that I'm leaving because...why, exactly?

Homeless girl out. Will give word when we reach our destination.

Moving far, far away...

There are so many little things that need to be done to move across the country. Stuff needs to be packed and shipped or given to St. Vincent de Paul. There are plane tickets to be bought, hotels to be booked, cars to be rented. We aren't even on the plane yet and we've already booked appointments to look at apartments in a town that I've been to once. The whole process is so daunting that something will inevitably be forgotten. I made a list of things to do today and I'm sure that I've already forgotten something.

One thing that complicates this whole process is that we have cats. These cats are going to be following us across the country to the great northeast. Obviously, flying with a cat is only slightly less insane than driving with one. There is still a cat carrier involved; only to go through airport security, you have to take the cat out of the carrier and walk through the metal detector. This is after you've somehow handed the TSA agent your ticket, your I.D. and the cat's health certificate. Then, you somehow get the cat back into the carrier and proceed to stick them under the seat in front of you for the duration of the flight. Hopefully, after your cat scratches heal, your cat will have forgiven you. I'm not counting on it, because we don't have an apartment to take the cats to.

Nope, we're going to be hotel camping. This is a proud tradition in my family, since we did move thirteen times in twelve months. I'm very afraid of this particular portion of the journey, because we'll have cats. In a hotel. That's crazier than flying with cats. There are so many things that can go horribly, horribly wrong. What if the housekeepers let the cats out? What if the cats decide to hide under the bed and not come out? What if, what if, what if?

Hopefully, in two weeks, we'll have a place to live and the cats will be getting over their anger and acclimating to our electoral vote splitting home.

We know where we're going!

The title should be self explanatory. There is no doubt about where we're headed. We're going to the east coast, to a state that has lovely autumns and a rampant wild turkey problem. The state's name has one syllable and is one of only two states in the union to split their electoral college votes.

Leaving

On Friday the 13th, my husband and I shall begin our frightening journey. Phase one of this journey shall involve us spending the weekend up north, in the strange little town that we grew up in. Phase two will involve us flying somewhere on Monday the 16th. Then, we scramble to find a place to live and a car to drive, all while living in a hotel/motel with cats.

The shortest version of the story is this: starting the evening of Friday the 13th, my husband and I will be homeless.

Pure, concentrated, crazy

So Hillary Clinton is actually suggesting that she'll suspend her presidential campaign on Saturday. She wants her supporters to support Obama. That'd be swell, and some of them might actually do it. Not these crazies, though. Sure, Obama has crazy supporters too, they just don't have a website that I can easily access. This website is pure, unadulterated crazy. Be sure to read some of the comments; several Fark.com memes have resulted from this one website. It's madness.

Let's all move on to the craziness that will be the Veepstakes. I realistically want an Obama/Clark ticket, but would settle for Obama/The Doctor. Hillary has already managed to inject herself into this mess, saying that she'd be willing to serve as Obama's VP for the good of the party. I am only glad that it will occur before school starts so that I can observe the madness. Sadly, I'll be feverishly studying during the conventions, but I'll make time for that too.

Your Mama?

For something completely different, this right here is why I love The Stranger. Nothing is sacred and they have Dan Savage.

I'm going to miss it here.

Exams

Most Americans have some experience with standardized tests. Throughout primary and secondary schooling, students take a variety of tests to determine if they're making the grade. Tests such as the Iowa Test of Basic Skills (ITBS) are pervasive and used all over the country. The results are more of a diagnostic tool than anything else though. It's not until high school that standardized tests in America are able to determine more about your future. A high score on the SAT will make your application to elite schools more likely to succeed, whereas an average score, not unlike mine, generally relegates students to state universities. Even then, though, the tests aren't the be all, end all in a student's future.

Graduate school exams are similar to the SAT, but narrower in their scope. On the MCAT, for example, it is not necessary to complete any analogies (thank God). I had a hard enough time getting a reasonable score in the physics section; if there'd been analogies I would've been totally screwed. Your score helps make your application more or less competitive; notice that I did not apply to Harvard or Yale. It does not necessarily exclude you from medical education, however.

Standardized tests in China, however, are quite a bit scarier, in my opinion. High school students take a single, two day marathon exam called the gaokao. This exam can and does channel students to specific tiers of colleges, not unlike America. The gaokao is the only factor that universities in China consider in selecting students, which makes it far more powerful than the SAT can ever be. A high score can send a student to MIT, whereas a low score can send the student to a community college. The disparity in the perceived status of these colleges can and will affect the student for the rest of their lives. There is only one analog that I can think of in America.

That exam is the medical licensing exam, either the USMLE or the COMLEX. A student's score can and does determine what specialties they are able to go into after they complete medical school. A student scoring about 240 on the USMLE is eligible for prestigious residencies like plastics and opthalmology, whereas a student scoring around the national average is eligible for residencies in pediatrics, family practice, and other primary care specialties. This can be quite upsetting for a student who is gearing for something like opthalmology. Imagine working through the first two years of medical school, only to get your Step 1 scores back and realize that you cannot get into that residency. That is really the only American analog to the gaokao in China. And maybe that's a good thing.

Political Junkie

So presidential election years are like my Christmas. I don't know why, exactly. I love the speculation, the fact that the whole thing resembles "Survivor." I've always been this way.

I come from a very left leaning family. We're the ones who caucus for Kucinich, vote for Stevenson, etc. We're the ones that initially liked Ralph Nader. May we express our sincerest apologies for that, by the way. Essentially, my family and I are very rarely on the winning side of the democratic nomination process, much less the general election.

That's why tonight is so cool. I actually picked the winning democrat. What's that about?

I wish I was in Minneapolis tonight. I think it would be a great place to be. Instead, I'm out west, preparing to go east.

Moving Day

Moving day is officially Monday, June 16th. We aren't sure where we're moving to, but that's our day. We're actually leaving our apartment somewhere between Thursday, June 12th and Friday June 13th. We'll be crashing up north with our families through the weekend, after which said families will drive us to the airport.

Oh, and did I mention that we have cats? Two of them. Next Wednesday, we get to go to the doctor (me) and the vet(them) and get shots (both of us) and official paperwork (both of us).

Crap. We're at two weeks from departure. Wasn't it just October?

Gettin' Ink Done

Prior to moving to ______, I am going to get a tattoo. Of course, it's going to be a highly nerdy tattoo of serotonin. This will be my first tattoo, and I am both excited and apprehensive. It seems like a good time to do it though, because I'm getting ready to move to start medical school, and ending this non-academic phase of my life.

Everyone ought to watch Doctor Who.

FLDS

Unless you're living under a bridge somewhere, you've probably heard of the FLDS polygamist group in Texas. You know, the group where 400 children were forcibly removed from their parents and are now involved in the biggest custody battle in American history. This is one of those cases that causes people to really examine large enclaves of people with scrutiny. If they group together and are isolated from other people, they must be up to something, right? The whole debacle just breaks my brain a little.

Anyway, I was at a family shindig recently, talking to my cousins, when the FLDS people came up. Specifically, they came up because one of the younger cousins had previously lived with her mother in a very cloistered, conservative enclave. My cousin was trying to think of a way to describe them and stumbled on his words, saying that they were kind of like the FLDS, but not as extreme. Then, he succinctly said, "You know, skirt people."

Such an apt analogy.